Well, this has been the most eventful new year ever! I didn’t declare any resolutions but opened my mind and heart to the haps of life in the “happy” of the new year. And so they began, I had a blockage and lost A LOT of weight. Concerned that the medications weren’t helping and possibly cancer, my husband takes me to the ER. There they find the blockage, and I don’t have cancer! This is a burden off my shoulders like no other and feel like I could dance and sing though I’m still gaining meat on my bones!
After this event, my thyroid must have decided my body needed help and began to go into 6th gear. Yes. Thyroid Storm. For a few days, I thought perhaps it was just weakness from the blockage, until it became too much. Thankfully my doctor let me see him quickly, and with out hassle and gave me the treatment for the Thyroid Storm. Why not rush to the ER since it can be fatal you may be wondering, well I haven’t insurance! With in 48 hrs of thyroid suppression, I could move again! Think! Feel! Smile! I was so shocked that such a thing as a thyroid could, BOOM, freak out and hitch hike on a roller coast I’ve not been riding.
So, during these times you find out who your true friends are. You find out that “I care for you” may mean “I’m just nosy, bored and jealous” or “I have no life”. It could mean “You mean more to me than my job” or “I’ve cancelled all my plans for you”. And, all of these I have experienced. I thank to cosmos for my good sense to read the signs and know what the universe is telling me. It’s telling me to be ALIVE. It’s telling me of humanity. It’s tell me that I have every right to be a nice person and ask a question nicely, but I don’t have to be yelled at and try to make it right. There is no living by living in the realm of the oppressors. Oppression of my thyroid was beyond my control. And, oppression from humanity, economy, and such are also uncontrollable. But, we have the choice to walk away: middle finger up if you feel so obliged but I could care less. When I see a human “caring” out of self indulgence for the sake of whatever they stand to gain, I can not rush them to the ER. No. But, I can lessen the ripples of the echos in this web of life but walking the path of self awareness and as best open to freedoms as I can, with knowledge and love that soothe the tremors of humanity. And, I think the catalyst for those who betray, lie, or become aggressive and hurt in anyway is unhappiness. Now that is a dose of energy I do not wish to bath in. Instead, I embrace my shadows and weaknesses for what they are and hope they help me keep afloat on this river unwinding. Now, if my thyroid tries to drown me, well then I will go to the ER hehehehe
So, beyond that, I have been dreaming up art pieces and spending time with my little gymnasts and teaching the idea of virtue and morality. For like my 6 year old says “All things are imagination and are not real until we imagine them to be so.” And the imagination of love and war, make for interesting convo. Hm. Please respond to your theory on these two elements and their fabrication, for I must rest my weary head! Until soon 🙂